When is society going to start getting politically correct when it comes to mental illness? When are words like “crazy,” “nutter,” “looney ” going to become just as offensive and disgusting to use as the words nigger and fag? When someone utters those words everyone stops and stares–it defines that persons way of thinking. But when someone refers to a person with a mental illness as a “looney” no one even bats and eye. As a friend said, “its much more acceptable to be an alcoholic than mentally ill.”

We have a friend who is a paranoid schizophrenic. He refuses to get real help, even though several people have talked to him about it. And yes, sometimes he is a bit much. He has rants and conspiracies–talks to otherworldly beings etc. (and as a Shamanic practitioner–I do not doubt that he does!). His reality–what he sees — is not our definition of reality. His reality is defined by his illness. The schizophrenic mind does not agree with reality. It is a psychosis. And, he cant help that. He is a good person with a good heart who is very intelligent. He cant help having a mental illness. No one knows what deck of cards they are going to be handed when they are born into this life.

Yes his behavior can be erratic and yes you do have to constantly redirect him during conversation. But he is not a bad person. He recently has been kicked out of a cafe for his rants, and has had altercations with other folks. In the past, he has had the shit kicked out him from police and people in society who don’t understand the simple fact he is sick. I am not saying that he should get away with every little thing–and that his behavior is always justified. But he is ill. His angry outbursts are not out of malicious intent; he can not help what is brain does. Outbursts and angry rants are par for the course. Its part of the illness which is schizophrenia. And like cancer or any other physical illness, schizophrenia varies from person to person.

What upsets me, is the reaction people have about him. Not compassion. Not empathy. But utter disgusting hypocrisy and hateful words. For example  (and these are direct quotes):

” I can read a loon as soon as they open their mouth to speak.”

Ask the alien race hes hangin with…they might be able to shed some light on the dysfunction.”


“Loon”—“dysfunction.” Would you say this about a person with cancer? Parkinsons? Would you tell them they are full of shit? Would you call them names? Absolutely not–because its WRONG.

And yet, when it comes to mental illness…people say whatever they want about the person because they think, “well,  they are just crazy.” And that is why society can be a disgusting hypocritical beast. Its not OK to use racist or bigoted words, but it is OK to use hateful mean words to someone with a mental diagnosis? How is this acceptable? And people who find it funny, should be ashamed of themselves. No matter how a person is reacting with mental illness–no aspect of it is funny. No one makes fun of mentally disabled people–Asbergers, Mental Retardation, Down Syndrome….because they can SEE the disability. Well guess what–mental illness is no different!

I cant tell you how many times I have been called “crazy,” “emotional,” “full of shit,” “faking it.”—And you know..that used to really hurt me. It hurt because no one understood the battle I deal with every single day of my life. When I am a happy person and and yet my brain is full of despair and anxiety. Now, I get pissed off. And I get pissed off when people in my tribe are called these things because society thinks its okay.

Its about time that society start getting PC about mental illness. People should think about their words before they open their mouth about someone who is mumbling to themselves on the bus, or crying all the time, or fearful of going out to go shopping because their brain is on constant fight or flight–or any of the other mental illnesses out there that appear to be “crazy” to society.


There Is A Crack In Everything

I hate cliche’s. I hate “kumbaya-hold hands” bull shit. And yet I find myself becoming the Queen of positive cliches lately. Simply because they are true! Which I cant believe I just admitted to.

I think it simply takes wounds–and lots of scars–to make you realize that all that touchy-feely “one day at a time,” “trust the Universe,” crap you always hear the “hippie” folk talking about–is actually true.

We are all wounded. Some of us more than others. Some physical, some mental, some emotional–there is not a single person on this planet who has not suffered some type pain. And anyone who says that they have never been broken are living in serious denial. Anyone who has ever breathed a single breath on this Earth has experienced some type of scarring. Its part of being a human–and part of being a soul.


Going through some heavy emotional and spiritual issues myself lately, a friend recently recommended and article about healing our wounds with gold. Lots of things stood out to me, but the most was a quote from Leonard Cohen’s song “Anthem”: “There is a crack in everything. Its where light comes in.” That quote literally made me reevaluate my feelings towards super cheesy love yourself cliches. We all suffer. Every major religion (and some that are off the beaten track!) all believe that we must suffer in order to achieve spiritual bliss. Its not fair and frankly sucks at best, but its through suffering that we realize what can make or break us.

People have commented to me over the past two weeks how different I look. How happy I look. Its because I wont let wounds and scars define me. I will only use them to make me stronger, to use them to push me towards growth. Realizing that you are strong–well its an amazing thing. Even when you feel like you can only go down-the super human strength you get from scars–is pretty awesome.

In days, weeks or years–you will look back and realize that you did in fact learn something. Or, that The Universe does work in some crazy and mysterious ways. That what you believed was the end of the road was actually the path to a new journey. You will realize that every situation, every person you meet, every soul you touch, or every soul that touches you….good or bad….was meant to.

ImageThose cracks-that you thought would always be there-they will close. You may feel like a shattered piece of glass–but you glue yourself together and build character. Essentially, you are creating……well you. I think as humans, we underestimate our souls, our spiritual selves. Our souls are here experiencing life at this very moment. Its taking everything we learn–the pain and the suffering–the joy and the sadness-and creating a sacred tablet onto itself so when this life is over–you will have something to share in the next. There is only one thing in the world that can help seal up all our cracks-that can help our soul realize its strength. Love.


Love is a word that everyone associates with mushy lovey dovey relationships, which is fantastic, but not just the definition of love. Love is about loving YOU and who you are becoming–with all those cracks–Its about being a bit selfish. Realizing what YOU need to be able to grow, which sometimes means ending relationships or starting new ones. Its also about unconditional love. That unto itself, that is the hardest of all things to learn. Loving unconditionally-including yourself-is about not only acknowledging someones pureness–but also the darkness. Its about understanding that we are not perfect-we are not meant to be perfect. We are meant to be imperfect. In order for us to let the light in, to seal up those imperfections, we have to acknowledge them and embrace them. In order to move past pain, and sorrow, and being broken-in order to glue yourself back together–you have to acknowledge all those things about yourself that you don’t like; because in the end, we all have cracks. And when you acknowledge those bits of you that you wish you could do without–its when you see the beauty in the life around you.

That is how we heal our wounds.  That is how we let the light in.